I saw this quote earlier this morning on Facebook and it made me realize just how much my motherhood journey has pushed me to grow – but also how long it took me as a mother before I realised just how important a role my own happiness and wellbeing was to both my being a parent, as well as to the happiness and well being of my daughter. Being a happy mother over a perfect one was something that only came to me much, much later in the game…
There’s something about the way our kids know, without us having to say a word, when something’s going on with us – whether we’ve had a day from from hell, are holding back tears, or are so stretched and stressed that the smallest thing sets us off… regardless of how well we think we’re hiding it.
They don’t need our words to know. They can feel our energy.
And it influences the way they act and feel too. Don’t believe me?
Next time you’ve had a bad day and just want to go to bed, notice how they seem to know exactly which buttons to push that set you off. Or if you’re down, how affectionate and nurturing they become towards you.
Perhaps it’s because we still carry some of each other’s cells and DNA, or the spiritual connection that comes from growing and birthing a soul. Whatever it is, your kids are an extension of you – and your happiness influences their happiness.
My first few years of motherhood were filled with conflict, pain and high emotions, and no matter how well I thought I was hiding it and putting on a brave facade for my daughter – it eventually showed in her own behaviour. My lack of taking care of myself, thinking I was protecting her and sacrificing my own wellbeing just to make sure she had what she needed and wouldn’t know that there was a sh*tstorm of chaos around her… eventually made itself known that I was, in fact, only fooling myself.
The day I made the decision to put a stop to the conflict, to heal myself and work on my own happiness – she (my girl) bloomed into herself too.
You see, when they feel our pain, misery, hurt, anger, confusion, etc. they don’t know what it is, they only know that it doesn’t feel right or good or safe. But when they feel your happiness, your love, and peace – all is right in their world and they thrive!
If you’re feeling like this, or have felt like this, know that there are SO many mothers who have at one point felt the same – many still do. And if you’d like to start making a change towards happiness and healing, balance and wellbeing, or simply figuring out WHO you are – then let’s chat. You’re already the perfect mother… let’s get you to being the happy mother.